I don’t know when I wrote that poem “Unsettled“, or why, but upon seeing it now, I like it 🙂
And the reason I came on here, this mid-day, within a Lunar Cycle of the Capriconic Solstice, was to write. Yes I Came On To Write, (before seeing that draft, and there are more drafts, but for editing/sharing later!!) To Hold A Space For Myself To Remember Moments When I Felt And Saw Who I Am, Clearly and felt in connection with the deep, vital neutrality, that unhindered direct connection with the larger Universe. I haven’t had much clarity lately, I’ve been trying to swim in rough seas created by myself, and our hierarchical society and it’s inabilities to meet our needs. I’m drowning in that trauma, for a while now, and I’m reaching the point where I need to throw it all up, and clear my throat, and all chakras for that matter. I need healing, but let it be known that healing is already begun.
I’m not going to make a list here in this moment of the aforementioned times of clarity–I have enough clarity right now to know that isn’t what I am in need of. What I need must take place far more internally than these written words, than lists, than identity; what I need is already taking place internally, and I feel my heart strengthening, bringing me protection to be who I am and why I am. I’ve gotten glimpses into this many times in the past, not just visions, but enduring feelings and guiding energy. I know it was real, I know it is real. It doesn’t come and go; it is eye who I’ve been coming and going, looking in places I knew were wrong…
The right path starts with me, my healing starts with me. And I can and will do all this as I wade through this waning daylight. I have love and light within, that comes from sources more ancient than I, and I embrace this, I embrace myself, simultaneously ancient and new. I love myself now and forever, and why wouldn’t I? I am a localist, a community person, and there’s nothing more local, more immediately able for me to help, than myself. In permaculture terms I must focus on Zone Zero. You (as I) are the Universe you’ve been searching for, you can be the a well of vitality at any point, a center among many centers, so to speak. How do you think it is that the whirling dervish do not dizzy? Because they are their own planet, their own galaxy, and they are free from impositions, from bad relations in those moments. They are spinning into self-control, in healthy balanced relationship with those that they’d not waste the energy trying to control. They are energetic beings that exist in harmony with their surroundings, rather than being above or below them in disharmonic relationships of harm. They are their own zone zero, and you have this potential within you, too, and no one can take that away from you, only yourself. But why would you ever take that away from yourself…? It’s because you dwell in forgetfulness, as I usually have, as has become common for all of us. It is an unnecessarily dangerous place to dwell, you will disappear yourself there. Leave! Flee in the blink of your eyes’ opening! Be immediately patient!
And so I take it as an obligation to mention, for there is such a drive I’ve felt stronger than anything, to honor the new generations, the 7 generations, the ∞ generations. They enter our space and they have the newtrality, the uncorrupted wisdom. They are what we need to devote our time and attention to, so that they are rightfully our leaders, not forced to be our miseducated followers. We need to listen to them and support them however they say they need it. We dare not impose anything on them, or make them servants of this dis-eased society. The children are the clearest message of balance, of neutrality, of strength. Let’s not sap them, our saplings. Let’s honor them as they deserve, and as we need. The greatest wisdom is to realize that it dwells the strongest in the children.
Amor tod@s, I will return to reread this, these moments of clarity amidst a barren desert of dry fog. THE FORESTS WILL RETURN! The false fog will lift, dissipate, dissolve.